I feel a fool. An utter fool.
I have been betrayed by a person who has been a nearest and dearest friend, someone I have known for decades.
There is no point wondering how and why this person would do such a thing. Perhaps I am still too stunned to wonder, and it is just as inexplicable to the perpetrator as it is to me.
I am not angry. Just sad. I do not feel stupid. Just stupified.
How odd that this event brings to mind an encounter long ago and far away.
I had a meeting with a man arranged by a great old friend who sought out and delighted in finding unlikely people with unusual ideas. Always fun, sometimes exciting, but never dangerous.
This man happened to be a defrocked Catholic priest. Do they even do that any more — “defrock” priests?
This former priest had taken a little detour from religious avocations to astrology at which he had become highly knowledgeable and adept. He was going to do our astrological charts.
When I met him, he told me that through his study of the planets and deep meditations he had learned many fascinating ideas, some of which he related to me.
How I wish I had a better memory of that meeting. I remember only a fragment of what he said, but what I do is eerily poignant.
The essence of what he said is this.
As we reincarnate our souls travel from planet to planet. Each planet teaches us a particular life lesson. The life lesson we learn about on Earth is rejection and betrayal.
Rejection and betrayal. Think about it. Fascinating.
Well, I am too mired in feelings of rejection and betrayal at the moment to feel much fascination.
However, it certainly encourages me to never, ever make anyone feel in any way, shape or form even an inkling of the way I do at the moment, which I suppose is the point of the “exercise”. Perhaps.
My feelings of rejection and betrayal will pass in due course. Or at least the sting of them will begin to lessen over time. They typically do. For most of us.
In the meantime, boy do I wish I could remember what the other planets are out there to teach us. Hmmm?